Cuz it’s not yet bedtime.

1. My ex is still: friendly to me
2. I am listening to: nought
3. Maybe I should: stop binging
4. I love: being cuddled
5. My best friend: gets me
6. I don’t understand: spanish & french and i want to!
7. I lost my respect for: imbeciles in authority
8. I last drank: Crown Royal Canadian Whisky o/r
9. The meaning of my display name is: a nick name
10. Love is: essential
11. Somewhere: lies a possible new life
12. I will always: be the way I am
13. Love seems to be: frighteningly short-lived
14. I never ever want to lose: my individuality
15. My mobile phone is: functional
16. When I woke up this morning: breakfast became lunch
17. I get annoyed of: people who take too long to express themselves
18. Parties are: unworthy of my attendance unless there is booze
19. My pet(s): roams the streets when he feels like it
20. Chocolate: is one of my obssessions
21. Today I: binged and had a home movie marathon
22. I wish/hope: to stay in love for as long as elements permit
23. I really want: financial independence + the top job

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY—
What would you rather be called?

01. Babe or baby: baby
02. Sweetie or Hunny: sweetie
03. Darling or Hunny: hunny

PRESENTLY-
01. is your hair wet?: no
02. is your cell phone right by you?: no
03. do you miss someone? i miss many ppl
04. are you wearing chap stick? no
05. are you tired?: no.
06. are you excited?: no
07. are you watching tv?: no
08. are you wearing pajamas?: kinda

HAVE YOU-
01. recently done anything you regret?: not recently, no.
02. ever lied?: yes
03. ever stuck gum under a desk? no
04. ever kicked someone?: yes
05. ever tripped over your own feet?: a few times i guess

TODAY-
01. have you cursed?: i dont think so
02. Kissed someone?: no >.<
03. have you gotten mad at someone? no

RANDOM-
Q: is there a person who is on your mind right now?: Yes…
Q: do you have any siblings? 2 sisters. I’m the middle child
Q: Do you want children? perhaps
Q: do you smile often? it’s part of my job
Q: do you untie your shoes every time you take it off? no
Q: when did you last cry? yesterday! I watched “Becoming Jane”. I hate how independent females couldn’t fall in love properly in the old days.
Q: do you like your handwriting? it’s alright i guess
Q: are you a friendly person? most ppl say yes
Q: who’s bed did you sleep in last night? my own
Q: what color shirt are you wearing? pink sweater
Q: do you have any pets? They’re more like family pets
Q: what were you doing at 8pm yesterday? watching a dvd
Q: I can’t wait until: I finally get to go for management training!!! Or leave Singapore. Hahaha

Question!

Logically speaking, if a person receives higher education and comes from a moderately good family (intact, moral values reinforced), and is of working age today, he or she should aspire to do something bigger than the ordinary person, yea?

But what I find so far, especially among Asian people, is that even with a degree in hand, people here just want to settle for something small, without aspiring to climb up the corporate ladder at all, and to live & work in one location till retirement!

Isn’t it sad to know that with all the plentiful opportunities available and relatively convenient channels to roam the world and be a global citizen, people are still plagued with the village-like small town mentality?

Just a little thought that came up.

SFW Wrap Party: A complete flop, but an apt summary of Singaporean fashion.

My little sister’s studying fashion design, so she texted me about the Wrap Party at Zouk to night, about a couple of hours ago, and asked me to tag along. I was expecting some kind of nice glamourous party with models strutting everywhere.

Instead, I got duped of SGD20 for the entry charge (because I was 5mins later than 10pm; entry charge was SGD10 up to 10pm) and drink coupons (they used up 2 of my coupons for the single Whisky Sour that I ordered, which was very small in portion and tasted like stale piss), and the so-called “show” was nothing but a cheap and tasteless parody of the movie 881, Britney Spears, Tyra Banks’ ANTM, etc consisting of a full hour of drag queens and she-mans.

Granted, this must be a big Singaporean-inspired laugh material when they can have the perfect chance to make fun of themselves, of their “20 years of Singaporean Fashion” by showing a long queue of video clips of past fashion shows and then a torturingly long oddball parade. But given that this is supposed to be the big wrap-up to the Singapore Fashion Week and even David Gan was there to grace the event, shouldn’t it be done with a bit more taste than the horrific nightmare-turned-real episode that it became?? I believe there can be taste to humour.

This, was atrocity. And perhaps an example of a staple offering from Singaporean efforts.

Fruit of Idleness

The one thing with 2 off days in a row, is that you realise all you wanta do is reflect on the status quo, and end up putting off things that you told yourself while you’re working, that you’d do on ur off days… Like, starting on your self-taught Spanish lessons and, doing research to widen your knowledge which is relevant for your work.

I end up, usually, getting frustrated at my status quo because I’m an impatient and greedy little person. I keep thinking how I can’t wait to reach the top of my game, how I can do better, how I should try to be better all the time. I’m never really satisfied with my work performance. I am, what people call, ambitious. Anyway.

My mind is always buzzing with random thoughts when I’m not thinking about work. Therefore I ask many random “what if” questions. Some of them are, “If I die today, will you come to my funeral tomorrow?” and, (to the boyfriend) “Will you get over me if I break up with you today?” I think it comes with the stagnation of living in Singapore. There’s almost zero intellectual stimulation and meaningful entertainments in the everyday hustle and bustle. Maybe I should’ve tried my luck taking the LLB. Then I’ll be surrounded by Ally McBeal types. But I’m not good in my law subjects. Maybe I should’ve taken psychology (since I aced my criminology, sociology and social psychology respectively over my other management and law subjects) but there are a lot of people taking the social sciences whose minds aren’t compatible with mine because essentially, I’m a practical idealist. I’d like to think I’m optimistic, but grounded. Arts majors talk too deeply about philosophical topics that bore me, honestly. For one, if you like Sophie’s World, I’m not with you. I’m more on Malcolm Gladwell’s side.

Still, I drive the people around me crazy. For that, I apologize. I also apologize for my impatience when people can’t make up their minds quick enough about what to have for dinner, and when people take too long to deliver a point, and when they take forever to make themselves understood because they can’t speak English properly. I’m an elitist and purist of sorts, and I can’t point out what I’m picky about.

I think my crazy train of thoughts extends to my dreams too. I dream in colour, and the storylines are always extremely odd and absurd. Think of the Japanese movie “Paprika”, it’s somewhere along that line but more relevant to my life. The boyfriend always thinks it’s scary how my imagination is that ridiculously illogical and probably uninterpretable by Freud.

Recent meetings with friends make me feel fortunate to have them. I mean, there were some pretty destructive and shallow friendships I had when I was younger and too nice to be selective about who I keep in touch with. I guess it’s kinda hard when you hafta go to school and face the same people everyday. But as I age, only people who can relate to my straight-forwardness want to hang out with me. But sometimes I still find it hard to tell someone in the face that I think they’re too arrogant or they’re too self-absorbed or they’re not as great as they think they are. Still. Honest as I can be, I can still choose mercy over brutality.

I am also getting afraid of the power of my attractiveness. I don’t want to sound arrogant, but I’m not an ugly person. And I do get a fair amount of male attention, especially since I started working. I’m truly grateful cuz the boyfriend’s not the “jealous type” (a term used by my ex), and trusts me a great deal. But I’m not used to receiving compliments from strangers and mere acquaintances. I’ve never considered myself attractive in comparison to a handful of my female friends, so now I feel like I’m thrown into the shoes of someone who holds feminine power without any training of what to do with it. I’ve seen girls use their looks to manipulate men to their advantage, but I don’t think I can do that on an everyday basis, especially when it comes to work. All I have in useful possession are my common sense and my work credentials. I just hope I won’t get drawn to rely on my feminine charm to get what I want. Sounds a little bit hypocritical especially when everyone thinks all females use a little of their charm to get their way, but I’m a bit of a fair feminist, I believe in gender equality, and I won’t abuse the female advantage to contradict my belief.

Gee. Anyway. I wish I have the luxury of time and money to go to the World of Pinot Noir because it sounds lovely, and almost like what happened in Sideways! Anyone rich & free enough to go with me??